I realized that I have too many things to do nowadays...But who cares, right? At least I will never be bored! Anyways, I think I will have to hurry this post along, so I can get to do my "homework" and "job" too... And since they are both due very soon, I have to finish them all today. Hurray for me!
Remember my list about some great little inventions out there? Now, this one will probably amuse you greatly, if you liked the other one. Tho these things are not useful at all... since someone put some work in them, I guess they deserve to be mentioned. Here we go, a list of the most useless inventions...
1. Ear dryer
A machine to dry your ears after you've had a bath or been for a swim. Apparently, 'drying your ears has never been simpler or more effective'. Or, at £69, more expensive. The battery-operated device slots into the ear canal and blows hot air. Just to add to the lunacy, the instructions advise you to dry your ears with a towel first!2. Doggles
These canine sunglasses are apparently the latest in dog wear, providing 100 per cent UV protection. All Doggles have anti-fog lenses and no gaps to let in stray light, dirt or insects (phew! Wouldn't want Fido filling them with soil when he's digging a hole, or getting fogged up as he chases a rabbit!).(Here I have to add, that no matter what accessories/clothes you get for your pet... I find them all hideous, ugly, useless and in my opinion their owners are already half mad...)
3. Avocado saver
What keeps you awake at night? Worries about your job in these credit crunch times, or how to stop your avocados wobbling over and turning brown in the fridge? Well, if it's the latter, you can rest easy because this patented gizmo keeps the lonesome leftover half comfortable in its 'adjustable strap' until you're ready to eat it next day. The ultimate gadget that you didn't even know you needed.4. Rainy Day Cigarette Holder
Sometimes you just need a cigarette. But what if it’s raining? No need to be one of those pathetic smokers huddling in an alcove trying to get their nicotine fix without getting wet. Stand proudly in the rain, drenching yourself, secure in the knowledge that your cigarette won’t go out with the help of the Rainy Day Cigarette Holder. Or maybe just buy an umbrella. Your call.5. Cat Wigs
Have you ever taken a good look at your cat and bemoaned the fact that it didn’t look like a mid-1980s Cher? Apparently, you’re not alone. Kitty Wigs produces a variety of cat-sized wigs, guaranteed to make your cat look even more resentful of your presence than it does already. Maybe you can make your cat wear this electric blue masterpiece when you inevitably marry it to another one of your pets in a lavish ceremony. (...the fu*k?)6. Motorized Ice Cream Cones
This has to be the worst bastardization of a concept ever. Ice cream cones are fun because of how tasty the cone is and the challenge of eating them without getting yourself covered in a milk/sugar film. This pointless invention rotates your ice cream for you as it sits in a completely inedible container. I guess you might find this useful if you were a paraplegic. (Or American...)7. The Merkin
Have you ever been about to stand naked in front of a large crowd of people and been horrified to discover that you didn’t have enough pubic hair? Perhaps you’re in need of a good merkin. This handy-dandy pubic wig will disguise your embarrassingly bare genitals…when you’re naked…in public. Be sure to get the police take a full-body mug shot when you’re picked up for public indecency.8. Toilet Roll Hat
Yep, it’s exactly what it sounds like: a hat with a roll of toilet paper attached to it. You simply pull the roll down for those random sniffles or sneezes, and is particularly useful (or so they claim) for allergy sufferers.9. Diet Water
I don't even...10. Get a Grip Wine Glass Grip
Have you ever said to yourself, “Gosh, I’m too stupid to properly hold a wine glass!”? Do you wonder how you might make it abundantly clear that you are a clod in front of a group of sophisticated wine drinkers? Look no further! The “Get a Grip” wine glass grip puts a bright red grip on your wine glass that says to the world, “I am probably a toddler, and you should call child services right now.”+1. Check this out!
