...watched yesterday was a short little video about a bunch of dumb ways to die.

And although the video is actually an infomercial about what you shouldn't do around a train, I think the song is too catchy and the cartoons too cute for words.



That's the video, in case you didn't see it yet. 

So in celebration of this new hit song (I'm pretty sure that it is by now stuck in your head), and going with the idea that this could be a pretty good theme song for the Darwin awards, I'm going to share some of my favorite retarded ways people actually died. 

Also, while some people call these event tragic, I just thank everything in the Universe for natural selection. (And in case I will sometime in the future kick the bucket in a horribly ironic way, you have my reassurance that it's OK to add me to the list full with dumb-asses). 

1. July 2011, New York 

Some random guy tried to protest the motorcycle helmet laws, by riding his own motorcycle without wearing a helmet. 

Apparently mother nature didn't like this kind of stupidity, so she made it that way that the guy had an accident. By falling off the bike, and hitting his head. Suffice is to say, that he didn't quite made it. 

2. 2010, Brazil 

A couple was driving along a road in a heavy fog, when they decided they should pull over for a quickie. 

What they didn't seem to realize was that it was 6 AM, they were in the largest freeway of Brazil that had a HUGE traffic, and that the "parking lot" they chose for the encounter was actually the right-hand lane. 

The cargo truck that ran over them surprised them during the act - ah well, at least it was (mostly) painless. 

3. Mid 1980s, Tennessee

A little walking distance from the Middle Tennessee State University lies an electric substation. Since it's so close to the University, it is probably not a rare thing to see a bunch of drunk young adults stumbling down the road. 

Thus one night, when a couple of drat boys were walking down the lane in this same state, no one batted an eye. At least until they read in the next day's newspaper what happened to one of them. 

One of them spied a wasp nest attached to a transformer - so he decided that he shall pee on it. Thus, he climbed on the transformer and urinated all over it. 

The disturbed wasps were probably not in the forefront of his mind as he died because of an electrocution via his genitalia. 

4. 2008, Atlantic Ocean

This time we revisit the last few hours of a catholic priest, who decided that sitting on a lawn chair, that has a whole bunch of balloons attached to it would be a great idea. 

He, like the intelligent person he was, even took a bunch of precautions - he wore a survival suit, and he packed a satellite phone and a GPS. 

The only thing he forgot is that he didn't actually know how to use a GPS. 

As the wind took him out to the sea, he called for help via his satellite phone, but apparently in vein, cause no one could actually locate him, since he didn't know what to do with his GPS. 

Over the next few weeks bits of balloons turned up all over the place - and in the end the body of the guy was also found. Apparently he managed to pay a visit to his boss in the end. 

5. 1995, Poland

Some people take it a little bit too far, when it comes to proving how much of a "macho man" they are. So did this Polish farmer, who goes by the name of Krystof Azninski. 

He was drinking with his friend, when someone suggested that they should play some men's games. Apparently men's games around there consist of hitting each other over the head with frozen turnips - but this wasn't enough for some of them. 

One of the guys, trying to show how cool he was grabbed a chainsaw and cut off the end of his own foot. Krystof, who wasn't about the refuse a challenge grabbed the same chainsaw and with a simple motion managed to cut off his own head. 

When asked, one of his friends said: "It's funny, when he was young he put on his sister's underwear. But he died like a man."

So what do you think? Are you more intelligent than these people? 

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